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Posts Tagged ‘parenting’

How are we going to take back our country? Many of you out there have been studying on this question for years, just like I have. My opinion? We have to start small. And….you men are going to have to ride point, just like you always have when things get tough.

Let’s start (quietly) with the military and law enforcement arenas. Men are bigger, way stronger, and naturally more aggressive than women. You are supposed to be. This is what makes you men. For these reasons, those among us who have criminal tendencies or ambitions to militarily invade America are apt to tread softly when faced with other men who are willing to dispute their bad intentions. This is an excellent deterrent when given it’s proper place in the public eye. The female of our species simply does not have the physical presence to do this job.

On the other hand, in a civilized society such as we have, you men are also taught to show some respect for those weaker than you are in our social structure, such as women, children, and older people. This is what makes you civilized.

With the advent of Women’s Liberation, that segment of our female population who have not got a functioning brain began to make a nuisance of themselves passing sociological gas about “EQUALITY” because they have some dim notion that men are better then they are and of course, are not going to admit that. Basically, they were and still are, intimidated by men generally and have instituted a program in all our public schools to castrate you in the name of social justice. My thought on this is—-tell them to shut up. This is the one instance you don’t have to be socially acceptable when dealing with this type of feminine bilge.

For the rest of it, be polite. You can do this firmly by remembering that you are dealing with the weaker sex. (and man—don’t they hate to hear that!) It is true that their delicate feelings are more important to them then national or even local security. Besides being the right thing for you to do, being polite to the female dimwits who give themselves airs about their “equality” with you,  really yanks their chain. This will provide you with some comic relief on the job.

No one is raising their daughters to be ladies anymore, young women are expected to be tough, and independent. This is not making them happy and being both female and very young, they are not self aware enough to look at their teachers and parents and say to themselves, “you know what? This liberation stuff is crap. I’d lots rather have a peaceful home with a decent husband and a couple of children.” Because of a few maladjusted females, wife and motherhood as an option for a “successful” life for a girl are no longer even mentioned and whether they know it or not, our daughters are feeling cheated. They take this bad temper into the fields of the military and law enforcement and are allowed to pass it off as being tough. You men all know better than this. So here is my suggestion guys.

Stop pulling your punches. You men who have been called upon to “train” these young females in an essentially male line of work that calls for real muscle, which they have not got, have been pulling your punches during this training and you are not doing these females, yourselves, or your country any favors. Stop telling these poor fatherless girls that they are tough when in fact, they are merely bad tempered as I just said. You will have to hang together and cover each other when the liberated lesbians start bitching but hey—that’s what guys do best. And remember—no sexual obscenities  or sadism, just make them do what you do and hit them just as hard as you would any other male trainee. They won’t make the grade if you men (politely) stop giving them a free pass.

There is a beginning of a movement now among some of the women in our country who have been through the sexual revolution and will back you. I am not just talking through my hat when I say that a lot of American women are tired of being treated like one of the guys or even worse, a street whore, in the name of equality.

We miss you, gentlemen. There are young girls growing up in America who have never seen a real man. You do not have to tell a whore that she is “liberated” because she is offended by the plain truth. And the working definition of a whore is any female who does not show some respect for you just because you are men. You deserve our respect. Your country misses your input socially and politically. It’s o.k. for you to have a healthy set. You do not have to apologize for being men. Not anymore. So shake ‘em down boys.

A. Farwell

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This is a short post in praise of the men of my tribe. The hardworking Caucasian men responsible for the founding of these United States of America. I am just personally tired of hearing them slandered by political cheap shot artists. Caucasian men have set the standard for personal and national liberty that all of us, of whatever gender and ethnic background we may be, do currently enjoy in this great and bountiful land we call home. Their blood has gone into the life of this country. Their thought, standards, and sheer courage and persistence in battle have offered hope to the huddled masses yearning to breathe free. The sacrifice of the women who loved and supported them has gone into it’s heart. The respect of their sons and the love of their daughters has enabled this courage to be passed down through the generations that have continued to hold this nation up in times of trial and cultural slander.

These men respected their women — their wives, mothers, daughters, aunts, even cousins and worked to support them so that they would not have to deal with the roughness and often sexually offensive atmosphere of a man’s world. They did this because they were decent men, and kind, and had some tenderness of heart where their women were concerned. They were not chauvinistic. They were loving fathers, husbands and brothers.  They had a very good reason for wanting their wives and daughters to stay home.

When it comes to the extent of sexual pressures experienced growing up there is no such thing as equality. Young men get the hormonal crap beaten out of them while young women basically cruise and snooze in comparison. Men need their outlets of speech and humor to bear the load of sexual pressure with which they are afflicted from puberty, which is why they didn’t want females in their so-called male only occupations and why they did not encourage co-education at the university level.  They had no wish to be offensive and back in the day, men were very careful about how they spoke and acted around the ladies in social situations. With the onset of Women’s Liberation in the sixties, an astonishingly small group of females with serious gender issues of their own made enough public noise to over ride the protests of these men and look at the result.

We are missing our men, here in the land of the free. But more precisely still, we are missing our fathers. The decent fathers who do not just stand by with their mouths shut while political and educational pimps of both genders soil the emotional health of our children for the sake of their own vanity and the cheapest sort of political grandstanding.

Men need to be respected, because they are men. Their sexual and emotional needs are not to be made a subject of public derision or censure, neither are they to be considered any kind of crime. Their ability to lead with courage and honor is not ever going to be replaced by feminism.

Sexual modesty is, essentially, a masculine virtue. Think about this for thirty seconds or so and you will see that this is true. With the subverting of gentlemen in our society and all that term signifies, we are left with the flesh – flashing whorish climate of today. Our young people are not flourishing in it.

The last word? I am proud of my guys. They have a long history of beating tyranny in whatever form it takes, Feminism is one such and we will beat that too. Because although our men have been put on the front lines of this gender war by the emotionally unstable, our history of helping each other when times get tough will see us through. There is nothing wrong here that cannot be solved quite readily with cooperation  between genuinely considerate adult men and women,  whatever ethnic origin they may be.

How about a little grace here, people.

Alieff Farwell

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Since this type of thing seems to be growing and spreading in our society, we should all take a few minutes to analyze just why this may be so. How do we combat something like this? What is the root cause?

Well, the root cause is lack of natural affection during childhood and adolescence. It really is this simple, people. Combine this with the excessive sexual pressures we subject our adolescents to in the public school system by not adequately supervising them at such a crucial stage in their personal development and you have a great and efficient recipe for social disaster.

All of this traces back to the lack of nurturing.(http://wp.me/p1BaiG-5m) Nowadays, it is the accepted procedure for mothers to deliver in the hospitals and send their newborns almost directly into daycare because Mom has to get back to her real job. There is absolutely no attempt made at nurturing, no personal family bonds are being created. This is very, very bad.

As I have said before, emotional fulfillment is the most important aspect of sentient life and the basis for it is found in our birth families. If they fail to nurture us sufficiently in this respect, we are set up for failure in the rest of our life relationships. Recognizing this early lack can be a great help in processing the way we react to others in our adult lives and in clarifying our relationship choices. Let us consider a few basic facts of emotional life for humans.

1. The expression of natural affection from parent to child(not vice versa) is the blueprint upon which all of us map the course of our life relationships. This is how we learn to show caring and affection and consideration for others, regardless of gender. It is the only relationship we know that does not have an element of sexuality in it. It is not supposed to and if it does, in the form of molestation, it is the worst horror our society knows.

2. We all bond more closely with members of our own sex. This is a perfectly natural thing. Men and women process information in different ways and we are all more socially comfortable with people who think the way we do. We have more in common with members of our own gender on a day-to-day basis, therefore we seek them first when looking for a stable and fulfilling social environment.

3. The lack of natural, affectionate nurturing in childhood leaves us vulnerable (extremely) as we mature into our respective versions of adult sexuality. Physical intimacy becomes a substitute for this first and most important relationship in our lives and since the substitution has no real validity, the sexual relationship fails the minute the “new” wears off.

Sex is a wonderful and important thing to most of us. In an adult relationship, we allow ourselves to be vulnerable, trusting that the other person will not betray us, or desert us, or fail to consider our personal needs along with or sometimes even ahead of their own. Because you see, that is what our parents were supposed to do for us and mostly, did not. And that is what most of us are now seeking in an adult, sexual relationship. So. Is this expectation valid?

My opinion? Yes, the expectation is valid. The sense of protection and care we receive from our parents is the pattern on which we base the relationships of our adult life—all of them. This is the way it is supposed to be. There is no sexual orientation to this pattern, also the way it is supposed to be. The sexuality comes later, in adolescence and adulthood. Again, the way it is supposed to. We have raised up several generations of children who have no sense of their sexual orientation because they are all stuck in this childhood mode since it was never supplied to them when it was most needed. When they enter adolescence they combine the two, which is neither surprising or acceptable, either one.

The problem comes from our inherited emotional poverty. After the new wears off of a relationship we have two emotionally deprived people who sit there and wait for the other guy to step up and be the grown up. This is so very seldom the case. And after x number of failed relationships, many people begin to look at other options for that sense of emotional fulfillment that has been lacking in their lives heretofore. For this, they fall back on the premise I listed above as emotional fact of life #2. We all bond more closely with members of our own gender. This particular process is especially seen in women. I have noticed that many women turn “gay” in their thirties and forties after failed marriages and several children.

3. The lack of emotional fulfillment in childhood increases the sense of sexual need in the adolescent. This is especially true for young men. Their entrance into puberty is exclusively sexual, rampant, and since it is not being covered in our society by any type of adult amelioration, particularly emotionally shredding for them.

During adolescence we are looking about us and finding our place in this world, both as citizens and as sexual adults. Given the total lack of nurturing and natural affection we are starting our children out in life with, it is not surprising to me that so many of them are combining their emergent adolescent sexuality with their more important need for social integration and acceptance and supposing themselves to be “naturally gay” or “born that way” simply because American society totally ignores their basic emotional needs from birth. We are sacrificing our young on the altar of the Great God of Education and ignoring their most human needs.

After these poor, parentless people have turned to a sexual relationship with a member of their own gender in an attempt to supply the normal social intercourse that has been lacking in their lives, they continue their quest for acceptance, which has not been met by their same-sex relationship, by insisting that all the world condone what they have done by public legislation. And the American Christian conservative public is protesting in great horror at the unnatural relationships which their own ignorance and neglect have fostered. I don’t know about ya’ll but I call this a homemade mess. Now let’s look at the physical aspects of this question.

1. What feels good physically, feels good no matter who is doing it. This fact has added its two cents to the emotional mess of same-sex relationships. There is nothing wrong with sex. That is a fact. So what can be wrong with having sex with anyone, regardless of their gender? Can you answer this one? The several generations of young American men and women who have been deprived of their natural affection compass by our current cultural process are particularly vulnerable here. Most of us emerge into adulthood with both social and sexual needs and since the first is not met in any way, the second has become the slide rule used to determine social value. Not a good idea.

2. Lack of sexual satisfaction is common to both genders in their physical relationships. This is also a fact. Many men have been seduced into homosexual relationships simply because their basic physical needs are not being met by women. What does it say about us as a society that our sons feel they have to go to other men? And what about our daughters? Having to rely on men who have been both emotionally and sexually brutalized during their most sensitive years does not provide them with a reliable adult partner, physically or any other way.

This is because we do not give either gender of our children any advice or training about what should be happening in their bedrooms. Americans tend to be very puritanical about the subject generally. For the life of me, I can’t understand why. The subject certainly requires a sense of modesty, but this guilt ridden, hush-hush, leave your kids to get on as best they can mentality is beyond belief for intelligent beings. Sex is a normal function of life and should be treated as such and yet Americans still purvey this bad, guilty attitude to their children. We need to start imbuing them with the more correct notion that sex in itself is not bad, using other people to wipe your behind sexually, that is bad.

While sexual urges are common to both genders, the motivations for those urges are not the same, at all. For men the urges are predominantly physical, for women they tend to be emotional while in both cases there are elements of both factors. This does not make an easy mix to deal with.

From all the available evidence, neither gender seems to be satisfied with the current arrangement so they have taken to same-sex relationships in an attempt to complete their own needs. This is not working either. Domestic violence and bad emotional breakups are more common in same-sex relationships than they are in heterosexual ones, per couple. The LGBT is not publicizing this fact however. I am writing this in case any of you are thinking that a same-sex lover is going to be your ticket to emotional nirvana. NOT!

I am now going to write a very dirty word. It is a word you do not ever hear anymore, it being so very bad. Tenderness. This word is worse than libido, penis, lust, or even, low be it spoken, desire. It is not a word we allow ourselves to think anymore, let alone speak. Tenderness is supposed to be an integral part of our human emotional experience and it is no longer. It has been replaced by words like “hot.” Someone attractive to the opposite(or same) sex is spoken of as being “hot.” If someone expresses an interest in you, you are being “hit on.” This is intrinsically violent in implication. Our adult sexual needs have been reduced to this on the public level, heat and violence.

Without the natural affection and nurturing of childhood, tenderness has departed from every aspect of our adult lives, not just the sexual aspect. No one has cared for the tenderness of children, there is no allowance made for it in our public educational system. We go into daycare, almost from the moment of birth, into pre-K programs, then into twelve years of grammar and high school. We spend most of our child lives trying to cope with strangers. Is it any wonder that so many are turning to same-sex relationships in an attempt to feel that social bonding that is normal? The method is not going to work, but the motivation is understandable. Sex and affection are not the same thing. How are we going to re-instill this basic fact into such lost children as we have raised?

Alieff Farwell

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In order to continue with my adult sensitivity training we will first need some historical background. My specialty.

What we are dealing with here is a mind-set. People emigrated to America looking for a better future for themselves and their families. Basically, this means money, ergo, financial prosperity. Nothing wrong with wanting that. The tenth commandment says thou shalt not covet thy neighbors house etc.. It does not say thou shalt not covet a house of your own.

So most of the early immigrants were not prosperous home owners in the old country, which ever that was. The largest part of them were from comparatively poor backgrounds and that means they had an underdog mentality. They viewed themselves as less than their more prosperous neighbors and all their efforts in life in the New World were directed to eradicating this difference. This mentality became the American Dream.

These lower class immigrants saw that their more prosperous neighbors owned their own homes and sent their sons to college and they felt socially intimidated by them.  They also told themselves that since these more prosperous neighbors did not work mainly with their hands, they really did not work at all. This is not true of course. Having to work with your head is even more difficult than having to labor with your hands, but those who had to work with their hands bolstered their self-respect mainly by ignoring this fact of life. So the American Dream became a muddled mix of these three lower class ideas—if you work hard and go to college, you will be able to own your own home, thus you will become upper class yourself. This notion is based on a lack of self-respect and represents the very muddled thinking of the have-nots’. Any man or woman who lives decently with their families and neighbors and has consideration for the needs of others is a wealthy person—regardless of their income.

You see, poverty is not really about money. It is about emotional destitution. Emotional destitution cannot be cured with either money or college. People are poor because they have no self-respect, not because they do not have a six figure income and a diversified stock portfolio. Slopping four years of college over such people will not eradicate their poverty-stricken mentality and standing by while they ram college down their children’s throats has not produced a stable, wealthy, upper class population. Almost all of you who may happen to read this are victims of this muddled have-not agenda.  It won’t do any good to find fault with your parents at this late date but it will help you enormously to admit this to yourself. Here is what your parents should have done for you. If they did not do these things, you will know why your adult years have been so hard even if you did graduate from college.

It is a responsibility of parents to provide for their children and to do what they can to give them a good start in life. It is also their responsibility to tell their children what they are doing for them and why, especially when they are old enough to understand some of the work involved. This is how you teach children to be good parents themselves. Telling children the what and why of how you have provided for them is far more important than the amount of the provision itself. It is not necessary to leave them independently wealthy. It is necessary that they understand you have done what you could. This is solid proof that you love and care for them. This more than anything else will send them into their adult responsibilities with a sense of wealth behind them, irrespective of material things.

It is also a parental responsibility to aid you in selecting a partner in life. Did your parents do any entertaining for you when you were in your teen years or did they just send you out, alone, on “dates” where all the responsibility fell on you? Did your parents have a nest egg saved for you so you would have something to start your adult life with? Or did they just yak about going to college and expect you to go into debt for it yourself? Did they leave you the family home when they passed on so that you would not have to pay a mortgage yourself? Did they even consider doing so? Did they ever discuss with you in your later teen years what they had put by and how they hoped it would make your life a little easier? Did they explain to you why it was usual for the husband to be the wage earner for the family and the wife to devote her time to caring for the home and children? Did they tell you why the wife was to be respected and acknowledged for her efforts and the husband for his? The family is the major source of emotional fulfillment in our lives, not marriage. Marriage is a sexual relationship, an adult responsibility and although it has a fulfillment of it’s own to offer, it is also a chore. If your family did not provide you with any sense of loving care as a child, you will be ill prepared to support a marriage emotionally. How well did your family provide for you so that you could go into a marriage with something to offer your spouse? This is what parenting is all about. And as strange as this may sound, acknowledging these things now will provide you with a sense of emotional wealth although your parents did none of them for you. You can start with your own children. Even if they are adults.

The reason I have called this Adult Sensitivity Training is because as adults you need to be sensitive to the fact that most of you were left totally alone as children. Emotionally, financially alone. This is the reason for the divorces, the multiple “relationships” that “didn’t work out,” the fear of commitment that so many of you have.  Your parents did not even dimly consider their responsibility to you and this set up a legacy of emotional poverty. That hurt you back then but because you were just children, you could not articulate that hurt. The healing process will begin when you acknowledge the reason for the big black hole of your childhood years.

Now that you are adults, you need someone to be sensitive about your needs and to understand how hard your adult lives have been because of that parental lack and even though there are literally millions of you and only one of me—I’ve got you covered.

A. Farwell

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This blog is published to LinkedIn so I am adding this special post just as a reminder to my contacts and followers. The media today wants to give the population of this planet as a whole the impression that homosexuals are gaining ground and that we are all about to usher in a homosexual haven of tolerance and world peace. This is not true. The homosexual “lifestyle” is characterized by domestic violence, drug abuse, child molestation, and white collar crime. These people are not “tolerant” of decent, normal people and DO NOT EVER THINK DIFFERENTLY.

Where homosexuality is not tolerated, there are no child predators. This is a fact that the LGBT does not want published in the public media here. Most of you do not support a perverted “lifestyle” in spite of media propaganda so stand by your posts and stick to your guns. We are winning here.

A. Farwell

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During the Revolutionary War, one of our founding fathers made this much quoted remark–“Now is the time for all good men to come to the aid of their country.”

We can really use our good men today.  Because we are in the worst fight America has ever faced. We are being eaten alive from within in the name of freedom and rights. I keep asking myself– ‘who are these people and where did they come from?’ Where did they get the notion that making movies about sex with children and animals is a freedom our fore fathers died for and our mothers sacrificed their husbands and sons to? Where did they get the notion that freedom of speech includes public profanity and self-centered whining about what their employers and the  government “owe” them just because they say so? Pornography  is available 24/7 now on all the cable and satellite networks and sexual predators of women and children are increasing. Why is this so?

It’s because we are missing our men. Our mature adult men who are husbands, fathers, and brothers and who still retain a sense of what they need to do to protect their families, their wives and their daughters and their sons. In the last hundred years of political babble about women’s rights we have not been blessed with thinking females to head up such a cause and we are reaping the results of this today. Susan B. Anthony did not deliver many addresses on the subject of sexual predators that I know of.

During the first years of women’s suffrage much ado was made about woman’s right to vote and hold jobs in the professions. The EVIL MEN were “oppressing” the females of this nation by not encouraging their daughters to go out in the work force and be independent. Wives and daughters of respectable families were expected to occupy themselves at home and in their local communities. The man of the family worked to provide for them. Usually the father or husband but often this fell on the brother or even the uncle if the father or husband died and did not leave some sort of income for his dependents. And there was an expectation that he would do just that if at all possible. That is why savings accounts and life insurance were invented. It was so that the tender ones in the family did not have to expose themselves to the very real dangers and ugliness that awaited them in the real world. How dreadful! How limiting! How unfair, and unprogressive! And how very wise. Yes, I said wise.

You see, the men of that era, just like the men of this era, knew that there are predators among us and that their wives and daughters and their very young sons have no defense against them.

There are financial predators that offer loan shark type deals and easy credit to the young. Sexual predators and criminals of every sort choose their intended victims by estimating how much trouble there will be in case of attack. Unattended females and small children are an invitation that they are not slow in accepting. Our men seem to have this knowledge hardwired into their psyches. Probably from the thousands of years as the designated protector of the tribe/clan. Women not so much and children of course, not at all. So in publicizing all this liberation for females, our society has in effect, posted an open season notice on all the tender members of our society. We have totally emasculated the angry father/husband/brother deterrent value of our men. And believe me, that deterrent is not to be sneered at. Predators do not focus on an adult male with a self-confident air if there is any other choice on offer and our society has given them a smorgasbord of choices by casting our men in the role of supreme social villain.

Our men are not villains. They are our fathers and husbands and brothers and we need to show the decent, caring ones more respect on every level–especially in public. Let’s ’empower’ them again, for all our sakes.

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How many times have you heard this— “children need a college education so they will have a good start in life.” How many times have you silently agreed to the notion that children need a “good education” so they can “make it” in “society?” How many of you are willing to take another look at these two universal constants of our current social rhetoric? Do you understand the difference between need and want?

As I said in my last post, there really is no such animal as “SOCIETY.” It is for this reason that arguments about society, and it’s condition, are always so unsatisfactory. We are all individuals, unique unto ourselves. We use the term society to refer to a collection of such individuals. This is a matter of verbal convenience—not a definition. Therefore, society = individuals.

And even though they use the term “society” for convenience’s sake, in their own minds, people only relate to the individual. For example, why else is there such objection to making broad, sweeping statements about Jews, blacks, women, Hispanics, republicans, democrats, etc., etc.? It is because such statements are an insult to the individual. They totally ignore the principle of the uniqueness of the individual and show no respect for or acknowledgement of it. Therefore, let us agree that the first basic function of society is to teach respect for the individual. Without this teaching, there is no society, there are only lots of individuals in a constant state of emotional anarchy.

Let us further agree that the first step in teaching respect for the individual is teaching respect for the self. The notion of “I” is, after all, the foundation on which all further understanding of the importance of the individual will be built. People who have no respect for themselves will assuredly not respect anyone else.

Taking this one step further we have–Respect for the self must be taught by the primary individuals in a person’s life—the parents. To any child, mom and dad are society, therefore, society = individuals = parents.  So how can parents(society) teach the principle of self-respect?

This one is easy. They can’t.

It is not possible to “teach” self-respect to children, you have to provide them with it the same way you provide them with shelter, warmth, food, etc.. You do this by loving them. You do this by spending time with them because you love them and you like spending time with them. In this way the individual child will absorb the notion that they “matter” and this is the basis for self-respect. All children need this. There is no educational “system” that can substitute for this. It is called nurturing.

You see, self respect is absorbed from one’s emotional environment, especially(but not exclusively) by the young. Society(parents) cannot “teach” respect like a course in algebra. Parents can teach little ones their numbers, letters, and colors. Parents can teach growing children about gardening, cooking, auto repair, hunting, and fishing and sewing. As parents take the time and trouble to teach them these skills their children will automatically absorb a sense of self-respect and this self-respect will, in turn, allow them to respect others. They need a sense of self-respect and they need to have consideration for others, otherwise, nothing else they acquire or achieve in their lives will have meaning. Nurturing is what will give children a good start in life. Education, which is only information of various kinds, will not do this.

So now let’s take a look at the chain of ideas we have just created.

Society = individuals = parents = nurturing = self-respect = respect for others = a healthy society.

You will notice that education does not appear in this equation at all. That is because children do not need an education. It is not a physical or emotional requirement in raising a stable individual(society). If one has no education they will certainly feel the lack of it. In other words, they will want some education. For a healthy child, education will provide a broader point of social view, they will learn about other ways of living and earning a living and hopefully, develop some respect for others.

All of our social woes stem from the fact that education is being used as a substitute for nurturing. As a result of this, we are raising entire generations with a syndrome that pediatricians would diagnose as “failure to thrive.”

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